Tea, thoughts, and snowy nights

It’s snowing hard and I’m staring out into the darkness. I have tried to start this post for last two weeks. It’s hard to write daily.

I’m sitting on a plane flying to London.
I’m staring the sea from my hostel bed.
I’m sipping chai latte in small colorful cafe.
I’m staring out to the airport runway from my hotel room.
I’m trying to write something, anything in my own bed.

None of those sentences started this post. It took me two weeks to find the right words. It’s snowing. I can’t leave my mom’s place and return home because there is too much snow. I wrote a book review on Tuesday and travel post yesterday on Wednesday. I’m on writing daily streak once again. Maybe it will get easier? Probably not.

Lately, I have been listening to too many motivational speeches and spent hours just reading motivational quotes from Pinterest. Something inside of me wants to be that person who wakes up early every morning to do productive activities. I want to write thousands of words every day and finish a novel in 30 days. If there was a way to stop this addiction I have towards daydreaming for hours, you could see me as the first one lining up to test the cure.

I’m lazy.

It’s simple. I’m lazy, unproductive and keen to use a time for unnecessary things.

Maybe it’s not a bad thing? If I just could make money daydreaming. And maybe I can. My mind is writers mind. Whatever I do and where ever I go, my mind finds new story ideas and creates new characters based on the people I meet or see. Daydreaming. My pen has to move faster so I can make this thing work. Memories and thoughts are so quick to disappear. It’s hard to find paper and pen when you could just lay in your bed dreaming of new worlds. But maybe I can?

This post has once again been a mess. That’s who I’m so getting used to it. Random thoughts and quickly changing subjects. This is my blog and I do whatever I want. As long as I think like that, the writing won’t be that hard. My texts, stories and the words I write are made for me, not for anyone else. Let’s hope I will write again tomorrow. Who knows…

With love,

Lost Viivi

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Photo: Andi Rizal

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