Low point in my life

You know you have a problem when your procrastination has found a totally new level of stupidity. You are leaving away for over a week tomorrow morning but haven’t even packed yet because you’re stuck watching coin pusher and claw machine videos from the internet. Why the heck coin pusher and claw machines of all the videos you could possibly enjoy? It’s so addicting and especially when you should be packing, working and cleaning.

I was doing so good with my daily blogging. For a week and a half. I posted every day and it was so much fun. Then I decided to skip one day. Just one day… That’s not a bad thing, right? But then that one day changed to two days and now almost to three days and it feels again so hard to come up with ideas for posts. Look at me, I’m just complaining. It’s the easiest form of writing: bad feelings and stupid worries.

But at least I am traveling tomorrow. And my week has been full of meeting my best friends. I have written a lot and worked regularly. Everything should be good but it’s just hard to get anything done. It’s almost midnight and I should still do so many things before going to sleep. Maybe just one more claw machine video. Ten more minutes and then I will continue my chores… or not…

But aren’t those videos just so addicting? Now I want to play some arcade games.

With love,

Viivi with problem

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I can’t skip a day…

Hello everyone!

I didn’t know what to write today. I’m sleeping on my friend’s floor, the day is almost changing and I have promised to blog every day. It’s easy to write posts when you have one specific subject but this blog is something different. “Write about anything that’s on your mind.” So I was thinking when starting this specific blog. I was sure it would be easy but I was not.

How to come up with blog text idea from scratches? The only solution I know is to just write. Write even if it sounds stupid, and keep writing even if your whole mind is empty. They teach us this technique in university when learning about creative writing. Usually, you are not meant to show these texts for people. You’re writing for yourself. Just for yourself. And now I’m writing for everyone who knows me and for so many people who have no idea who I’m.

Okay, write about anything that’s currently on your mind. What’s in my mind? What am I thinking?

We watched today the last part of the Lord of the Rings. I had almost forgotten how much I love that movie. The plot, the characters and, of course, Legolas. Don’t we all love Legolas? If you don’t, there is something really wrong with your brain (just kidding).

Maybe I should list all the characters I have fallen in love with? That would be a long post. It would start with characters from children’s series. Robin Hood from the Disney movie and Odd from that cartoon series Code Lyoko. There would be Legolas and Draco Malfoy, Han Solo from Star Wars and let’s not forget the endless list of anime and manga characters. I always find that one character and their story more appealing than the movie or book as a whole.

Sorry for this odd, short and random posts. I promised to write daily but I never said these would be quality texts. But at least you will always learn something new about me and get a sneak peek to my brain. Do you ever have a hard time finding subjects for your blog posts? Or have you ever tried this style of just writing about anything and nothing in your mind?

With love,

Nostalgic Viivi

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Photo: Bryan Minear

Finding that blogging motivation

Hello everyone!

My first week of daily blogging is over and it has been amazing. Like truly amazing. Before starting I was thinking that writing daily to my blogs would be one big nightmare. I was expecting it to be super hard, almost impossible and me to miss days right away. That didn’t happen. For the last six days, I have been blogging every day and it has been a bliss.

The motivation and excitement I had during the first year of blogging have returned.

There are so many new ideas, subjects for posts and things I want to share with the world. My mind is full of thoughts that want to get out. Especially my newest blogs and writing them is just so wonderful. No need to stress what others think because I don’t have that many readers on those blogs and the subjects are something I’m passionate about. Writing, books, movies, and music. I could talk about them forever.

After writing every day for the last week, one thought has been constantly in my mind… I want to do this. I want to wake up late and start my day by writing. Then I want to continue by writing some more. Writing blogs, writing stories, writing anything and all the time. Reading books, listening to good music and binge-watching TV series. At some point going out and seeing my friends or sitting alone in small cafes in foreigner cities writing about the people walking past.

I will keep blogging every day next week, week after that, month after that and until the end of this year. This is a promise. Even if I am bad at keeping them, this one won’t break. How do I know?

When I once truly decide something (and when someone tells me that I can’t do it), nothing can stop me. Writing a blog, daily blogging and working as a full-time writer are things like that.

NOTHING CAN STOP ME!

With love

Determined Viivi

Who is Lost Viivi?

This is questions I ask myself too often and some of you may be wondering so let’s make a post of me introducing myself (even if I may be one of the most boring people in the whole wide world…) Feel free to ask any questions at any time in the comments and I will try to answer as well as I can. 🙂

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No, my given name isn’t “Lost Viivi”

Even if it would be funny, my full name isn’t Lost Viivi. Viivi is my first name (not Vivii, not Vivi and not Vivian even if it used to be my nickname). The word “lost” comes from me being always lost. I’m not even kidding. Whatever we are talking about knowing what I want to do with my life or walking around the streets of unknown cities, I always find a way to get lost. And being lost usually ends up me getting in some kind of trouble. For example that one time in Japan when I got so lost that I found myself from an abandoned amusement park.

Sometimes I also use name Viivi Severina but even that isn’t my full given name. Maybe someday I will share my name but right now that’s not important.

Where are you from? 

Finland. It’s a big country with only about 6 million people between Sweden, Norway, and Russia. We don’t have polar bears but Santa Claus lives in our Lapland.

How old are you?

22. Let’s not talk more about this. #agecrisis

What kind of person you are?

Shy, stubborn and hopefully kind. I’m introvert who likes spending time alone and never goes out to party on weekends but at the same time, I can live in full hostels for months surrounded by other people without feeling uncomfortable. I love talking to new people and listening to their stories. My friend calls me “human magnet” because random people tend to talk to me without reason and I meet odd people who want to be friends everywhere I go.

Don’t mistake my shyness and kindness as weakness. I may think others before myself and follow people around but if I have decided something, you can’t change my mind. When people tell me that I can’t do something, I will definitely prove them wrong. Someone once told me that I can’t speak English. People tend to tell me to get a real job. And I have gotten more than enough comments telling me to travel less. Guess what I am doing right now!

Why and when you started blogging?

I have been blogging on and off for years but in the end, my blogs have always died. I started writing in English about two years ago on my travel blog and I never stopped for everyone’s surprise. This year I decided to start daily blogging because last autumn I realized that writing is my thing.

The reason I started blogging in English isn’t so simple. My mind was in dark place after I had returned home from three months long trip to Japan. I believed that I was going to study something I hated for the next six years without a way out. Writing has always been a coping mechanism for me, writing a blog was an easy way to forget everything else.

How many blogs do you have?

Too many. Right now I have 5 blogs and 1 blog I use to share my daily posts from all these sites.

Travel blogLost side blog
Photography blog
Review blogWriter’s blog
Daily posts

Do you study, work or what do you do?

I think this subject and story needs its own post but shortly said I work as a writer who also studies. Last autumn I realized that I would, in theory, live by doing freelancer writing (for example writing blog posts for companies) and doing translations. In addition to doing this, I am studying two university degrees at the same time: creative writing and business. I study online so I can spend about half of my time traveling.

What is your biggest dream?

I have finally admitted to myself that I want to be an author. I want to write books. I have no idea if that will be possible (probably not in English because my language skills still suck). If I can’t be an author, I dream of living as someone who can write every day, live every month in a different city and find happiness. I want to leave my mark on this world.

What kind of family do you have?

Crazy, funny, tiring and just impossible to deal with. I probably shouldn’t write about my family because they know about my blogs but I doubt they would have the patience to read anything I write. I have two younger siblings so I’m the oldest and the wisest and the best (at least if you ask from me). My parents are divorced and I am currently living in my grandpa’s basement.

Favorite movies, TV series, books, music, etc.?

My favorites are changing all the time but I will publish twice a week to my review blog about these themes so read more from there. I like almost everything except horror. Crime-themed movies and books are my favorites. I listen all kind of music as long as I can listen to it all the time. My family and friends know me as the one who listens to Asian bands. Right now I am totally hooked on reading writing guidebooks but also my taste with books is almost endless.

If I had to name some of my favorites, I would probably mention these ones:

Movies: Now You See Me, Star Wars
TV series: Criminal Minds, Leverage
Books: Wild Mind: Living the Writer’s Life by Natalie Goldberg
Bands/Musicians: BTS, Nu’est, One Ok Rock, Sanni, Haloo Helsinki, NF

What are the plans for this blog?

I will continue writing whatever I want and how often I want. Now I am trying to make that daily blogging challenge happen so except posts in this random side blog every Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Sundays. Mostly the posts will be about my life and thoughts. In addition maybe some general “lifestyle” posts like sharing cool videos, tips, and lists of anything. If I can open up enough maybe some fangirling over books, bands, and movies. Who knows where this year will take us…

Feel free to follow me on my social media. I am super inactive on Instagram because I only want to share colorful photos. My Twitter is full of random rambling, photos of food, shared travel themed links and updates of my newest posts. Follow everything at your own risk… I always appreciate comments so ask anything or let’s have a conversation on Twitter. I’m shy but I won’t bite! 🙂

With love,

Lost Viivi

 

Mission Impossible: Daily Blogging

The year 2018 has started and I’m ready to fail in my impossible mission for a lazy person like me. Yesterday was the first day of my daily blogging for one year challenge. I have shared this with a few friends and Twitter. Most people have wished me good luck, others called me crazy. My own mind is mostly just screaming out of fear, stress, and excitement. I love blogging so why shouldn’t I do it a daily thing?

This is probably a stupid idea and my history as a blogger has more than enough proof. I have had several blogs but all of them have died after the first year. Last year I promised to write twice a week and then after failing that once a week. Do I even need to admit that I failed in that too? Now my mind just decides that writing once a day is a perfect plan. Crazy, huh?

Yesterday I wrote the first post on my brand new review blog. It’s one of the things I am most amazed about. So easy to just write when you have no one who wants to read. No matter what you say or if the language sucks. There will be only a few people reading and if they don’t like it, they will just skip your blog. I haven’t felt like that for a long time. Not after I told my family about my travel blog and realized that it has over a thousand readers. Now I have close to three thousand people following my blog and writing anything feels impossible.

I am scared of failing.

Does anyone know how to get over these fears? Maybe the only way is to just keep writing. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming. (I may have watched Finding Dory a few days ago…) Last autumn my university creative writing teacher got me hooked on reading writing guidebooks. That’s probably the biggest reason why this crazy idea of daily blogging came into my mind. There is one theme that keeps repeating itself in these books: Just write every day without caring for your inner voice telling that it’s a bad idea. 

Okay, no book says it like that. It’s always told more poetically and with fewer awkward words between. But the idea is same. If you keep writing consistently, it gets easier. Or well not easier but doing it everyday changes to routine and routine is often easy despite the task being hard.

I’m rambling while writing, aren’t I? You better get used to it. Writing every day also means writing without editing. Some people would accuse me of favoring quantity over quality. During all this creative writing I have studied during the last four months, I have learned to approach my blogging from a new point of view. The more you write the better you get at it. Later on, we can see if that’s a good thing.

If you are new here, welcome. I’m Viivi and I’m one big mess who owns too many blogs for her own good. Right now, I also try to live my dream life and that has killed my sense of reality. Feel free to follow this blog so you can read more odd posts or see my daily posts in LostViivi.com

What are your plans for the year 2018? Anything as crazy as mine?

With love,

Viivi with a plan (aka a bad idea)

2018, Year of Blogging

2018 is almost here. In my travel blog’s last post I mentioned that at the start of the year 2017 I promised myself it would be my year of traveling. Surprisingly, it was a quite easy promise to keep. Now it’s time to make my New Year’s resolution for 2018. Wanna know what I have decided? Or maybe the title of this post already gave it away.

The year 2018 is going to be my year of blogging.

If you are an avid reader of my blogs, you know that I am a blogging addict. It all started with my travel blog. Then I created photography blog to learn photo editing. After that, this side blog was born. And I have been talking about starting review blog for forever (I even have like 5 post written for it). In addition to all these, I have wanted to start writing a blog about my adventures as an almost full-time writer for some time now.

That makes 3 blogs and 2 blogs I would like to start at the beginning of 2018. Like I said… I am an addict.

During my travel year 2017, blogging became harder. I have had blogs before but I have never written them longer than for a year. The oldest of my blogs, Go Travel Global, will be two years next February. I have never gotten this far so I have no idea if the writing will get easier. That’s what I want to believe and so 2018 will be dedicated to blogging.

I know that I have told these plans to you earlier. “I will start writing twice a week. No more blogging breaks. Hey, I am back!” When we talk about schedule, I’m the worst. However, this time I have made schedule once again and my plan is to make this really happen. The secret? I started reading writing guidebooks a few months back and all of the books have one staying theme: You have to keep doing it and think it as a job or you won’t succeed. I am going to be blogging more than ever just you wait!

So, what is my ambitious plan?

Mondays: I will publish review post on Reviews From Idiot

Wednesdays: Wanderlust Wednesdays are back! Post every week in Go Travel Global

Fridays: Blog post about living as a writer in my writer’s blog Lost Writer Viivi

Rest of the days I will be posting on this blog. That’s a lot of blogging, right? In fact, if you did read that carefully it means blogging every day of the week for whole year. 

Don’t look me whit those judging eyes! You can think that I will get bored after a few days if you want. When I once decide to really do something there is no stopping me! Lately, I have been thinking a lot and come to the decision that even more than traveling I want to do blogging and writing. My content may not be perfect yet but I think my English skills and writing skills in general get better every time I write something.

Many people do daily vlogging nowadays so can we please start a new trend of daily blogging?

This seems crazy but hey that’s who I am!

Are you ready to start this crazy year with me?

With love,

Viivi Who Fell For Blogging…

I can’t sleep

For some reason, I have had super long jetlag after returning from my New York, Iceland and Sweden trip. I am sleepy at 5pm, my eyes won’t stay open at 8pm and then when I try to sleep I just can’t fall asleep. Hours of rolling around in my bed. And it gets even worse when I wake up at 5am after sleeping only for about 5 hours. I can’t fall asleep again. It’s just impossible.

What did I do to deserve this torture?

I have always seen a lot of dreams that I remember well but for these few nights, it has gotten even worse. I wake up feeling hazy. What is true and what is not? It would be easier if my dreams didn’t make sense. Can I get flying, dragons and falling in love with someone handsome and famous? Watching my family fighting, friends disappearing and my dreams getting crushed night after night gets boring quickly.

It hasn’t even been a week and the nights are still driving me crazy. I didn’t have any problems when I returned from Japan so why am I struggling so much right now?

With love,

Sleep derivated Viivi

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Photo: Mehmet Kürşat Değer

True raw emotions.

Today I want to speak about suicide. Yesterday someone who I have never met and someone who I don’t even know killed himself. I have never even talked to this person and he had no idea that I even existed but still, this death has impacted me. What else would you except when he impacted my life while still living?

Today I want to speak about suicide but I won’t. I don’t think I can. And that’s why I will tell you a small story.

This is a story of young Viivi who was always lost in her life and who didn’t feel like she belonged. This is a story of someone who found peace and way to continue from listening to music. And then when time went by this changes to a story of her finding a best friend through this strange world of listening to music from bands that you can’t even understand.

It starts at primary school. I can’t remember how. I see a video of band singing language I can’t understand and they are dancing almost too perfectly. It’s odd and new but still enchanting. Weeks, months and years go by me listening to music by myself. At some point, it’s not just the music and amazing videos. I start to watch reality shows, dramas and I remember all members of these bands by name.

I still have no idea what they are saying but I don’t care. I don’t need to understand to enjoy the music.

Then I go to high school and I meet someone who shares my interest. We become friends, travel to concerts, laugh for the silly reality shows and before anything else enjoy the music. It’s a magical time of my life. It’s so easy to be happy. When your own life doesn’t feel right, you can just make yourself to forget everything. Music takes all your worries away and these silly but talented people performing it can always bring a smile to your face.

Years start running faster and my life is changing. I find something else. Traveling, writing blogs and living my life. There is no time for everything but I never forget. When I open Spotify I still listen to kpop more often than not. Even one photo or one memory from the time of my life can make me delighted. It was my youth and it’s still my future. You never truly get over the things you have once loved and today I can see it so clearly.

Yesterday I was messaging with my friend totally normally and then out of nowhere, she asked me did I know why the internet was full of sad Jonghyun. I didn’t. It took a while and then she told me that Jjong had committed suicide. It didn’t sink in first. I haven’t been actively following what happens with Shinee for a long time but they are still one of the bands closest to my heart. I have cried, I have laughed, I have lived listening to their songs.

Shinee was one of the first bands I fell in love with. And no I don’t speak about kpop. I speak about bands generally in all music categories. There are about million memories I could share now because my mind is right now full of them.

Being fifteen and laughing at Amigo because in Finnish the song sounds like they are singing over and over again that they want to fuck. Dancing and singing RingDingDong alone in my room. Being addicted to so many of their songs that it is not even funny. Crying while to The Reason even if I only could understand the words from translations. Still remembering the words of Sherlock even if it has been years.

And lastly listening to Tell Me What To Do over and over again just last week in New York when I was feeling a little bit homesick. Even now it’s kpop and music that makes me survive the hardest parts of my life. Even now after years, it’s Shinee. It will always be Shinee.

Kuva:  BRUNO CERVERA

2017 Predictions, Did they happen?

A few days ago I shared an old draft of mine. Today we are continuing with another old blog post that I never published. I am passionate tarot card reader and I wanted to do a post where I predicted my year 2017. The idea was to make 10 predictions, but I only did 3. Let’s see if I was right!

I love reading tarot cards and surprisingly often my readings are close to the truth. So why not try to predict my own year 2017? And now see if I was even closely correct.

1.My year 2017 generally

“You are living hard times. Your spending and revenues are at the same size so you have to live modestly. Somehow you will cope without getting to problems with money. Use your brains to get out of the tricky situations.

You feel like everything is going to the wrong direction and you are losing the fight. Admit your lose and return to the beginning. That will be the only way to happiness. Say out loud your hoes and dreams. Then go towards them.

If you try hard enough and wait for the right moment the luck will finally be on your side. Wait patiently and everything will be just fine. You will get over any hardships on your way. Just believe in yourself and go towards your dreams.”

2.My personality

“Wanderer who hangs on her opinions even when others don’t believe in them. Someone who complains too much about the tiny stupid things. A person who tries to save money but uses it stupidly. Trying to be nice and kind for others even when struggling herself. A stubborn person who will get in trouble.”

3.Money, assets and material problems

“Get over your fears. If you give up you will lose your money/assets/property. Be brave in all situations. You have to work hard to make enough money. Try to live without spending to useless things.

You are living hard times. Your spending and revenues are at the same size so you have to live modestly. Somehow you will cope without getting to problems with money. Use your brains to get out of the tricky situations.”

So, were the predictions correct?

The funny thing is that I got a same money problems card for two different readings. Did I have money problems? Yes. Like the reading said for some time my spendings and revenues were same. Even now I am in a situation where I can’t spend to anything stupid. But still didn’t have any money problems and never struggled with getting by.

I have worked hard and tried to live as well as I can for the whole year. It’s starting to pay off. I get more and more writing jobs every week and if I wasn’t studying at the same time I think I would be able to do this as a full-time job. Isn’t that crazy?

“You feel like everything is going to the wrong direction and you are losing the fight.”
This sentence sums up my whole year… I started 2017 studying in a city far away from my home and I was miserable. It felt totally a wrong direction and I wanted to keep studying for the sake of “being normal” and “getting a normal job”. In the end, I gave up and found something better.

On the other hand, I am again in this situation but this time with my blogging and especially travel blog. I haven’t been writing because I am not sure what I want to do. But just now about a month ago I gave up for a while. I just stopped. Now I am again ready to start.

Maybe the most true of my predictions was this one sentence: “Say out loud your hoes and dreams. Then go towards them.” I remember this one class from spring when I was still attending to business school actively. There were about hundred people in our class and the teaches wanted every one of us to tell the whole class one thing we are good at. I was scared to death because I have always believed that I am not good at anything.

But at the same time I was panicing, one thought entered my mind. I can write. No, I want to write. I don’t want to study business, I just want to write. When it was my turn I said it out loud for the first time in my life.

“I am good at writing.”
For a moment it was quiet and then my teacher asked me “In what kind of writing?”

“I am good at writing stories, blog articles, about travel, poems, emotions, school work, research, comments, inspiring sentences, lies. I am good at writing anything I want.”

At this point, I had been writing all my life. For over ten years. But it had never occurred to me that maybe it would be my future. Of course, I had dreamed of living by writing books and being a real author but it seemed impossible in my small home country Finland. There was no way I could do it, right? Or maybe I could.

After I had said out loud for the first time that I am good at writing, I couldn’t stop. Words have more power than we think. Soon I am good at writing changed to I want to live my life by writing. Then about four months later I applied to study creative writing in Finnish open university. The words and dreams I had said outloud have started turn alive. I have no idea where I am going but it seems easier now. It is easy to change your own future if you just believe in your own words. Fortunately for me, writing words is the only thing I am good at.

I want to be a writer. I want to travel. I want to try out this blogging and writing thing because it seems to work and I truly love it.

With love,

Mysterious Viivi

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Photo: Sergi Viladesau

Sometimes I don’t want this travel life

After two years of traveling the world as much as possible while dreaming of life as a full time traveler and writing fastly growing travel blog, it’s scary to realize that in fact, you don’t want to travel. You have been running towards this magical life waiting for the perfect happiness just to see that this won’t be the right things for you. Maybe traveling isn’t the answer?

I don’t want you to understand this the wrong way. There is nothing better than sitting hours on an airplane going towards unknown, meeting strangers in hostel dorms and seeing the sunset in a new city every morning. I love traveling and I could not live without it. But there is something else that keeps me grounded.

I can’t stay at home for too long because my feet get itchy and mind starts to wander to new countries. But at the same time being in a new country for too long tires me endlessly. Waking up is hard. Let me tell you a secret: I may be staying in this amazing new country with so many places to explore but all I can think about is that I want to go back home. There are so many things to see. Maybe too much.

This may not make sense to you but for me, it’s the reality. I am lost like usually and still, I know exactly where I should go. Traveling is my thing. Definitely. But so is staying at home, sleeping long and just writing endless stories while staying in my bed from morning until I am too hungry to continue. I want both. Is it wrong of me to not want to decide?

In perfect case scenario, I would live every other month in a new city. Tourist attractions, unknown streets and writing my diary in small cozy cafes while watching the locals around me. Writing travel blog about my experiences and thoughts while experiencing all these unforgettable things. Finding new friends and meeting the ones who I have met before because of this crazy life of traveling I currently live.

But then after a month or sometimes maybe two, I would take that plane back to home. My back would be full of souvenirs and gifts for my family and friends. My blog would be still full of travel photos and stories I haven’t yet been ready to share. The first few days would just go by sleeping in my own bed and watching Netflix, relaxing and meeting friends. Then my days would be full of writing. Stories of my adventures but also about everything else. Going to seminars or attending to all kind of open university glasses.

For a month or sometimes maybe two, I would hang out back at home walking the streets I know so well. During that time I could work even more writing and maybe doing a little bit of translating to get by. My main aim, however, should be creative writing that I am even now studying. Then after that time at home, my feet would take me again to new countries and unknown places.

Being free and going where ever you want. Is that too much to ask?

With love,

Viivi who wants everything